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Advice for Lady Gaga, Sofia Vergara & Other Alpha Females

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Women and Divorce

San Diego Divorce Attorney’s Advice for Gaga and Vergara

 Lady Gaga and Sofia Vergara’s sizeable income may speak volumes about their successful careers, but it also could be an omen for their recent engagements to actors Taylor Kinney and Joe Manganiello, respectively.

You see, Gaga’s and Vergara’s fiancés have more in common than their good looks and career choices- they both make significantly less than their leading ladies.

While some men may think Kinney and Manganiello have hit the jackpot, studies have found that men are more likely to cheat, become depressed or seek divorce when their wives make more than them.

But don’t throw in your towels just yet, Gaga and Vergara. We have found a helpful book catered to the unique dynamic presented by your relationships: When She Makes More: 10 Rules for Breadwinning Women, by Farnoosh Torabi.

 Torabi’s firsthand experience as a breadwinning, or Alpha, female have allowed her to delve deep into how income imbalances affect relationships, and how to overcome common pitfalls.

Ten Rules for Breadwinning Women

The following are summaries of Torabi’s 10 essential rules for finding fulfillment and success at work and at home.

  1. Face the facts- You make more and he makes less, and because of that dynamic, your relationship is more susceptible to infidelity, burnout and divorce. Couples have to recognize the pros and cons of their unique situation to effectively deal with the psychological costs.
  2. Rewrite the fairytale – Society may have taught you that women marry a Prince Charming, but you have to rewrite your fairytale and change your expectations to achieve a healthy, fulfilling relationship.
  3. Level the financial playing field – Divide or combine finances to suit your family’s unique dynamic. Financial chores should be divided according to each partner’s strengths.
  4. Hack the hypotheticals – As the saying goes, when you fail to plan, you plan to fail. Plan for retirement, make care arrangements for your aging parents, and sign a prenup or a postnup – not because you believe or want your marriage to fail, but because you have considered all of the “what ifs.” Heidi Klum planned for the unthinkable and it paid off.
  5. Cater to the male brain Level the emotional playing field. Don’t deny the psychological toll that not being the breadwinner can have on a man. Husbands, be open about your feelings, so negative emotions don’t build up.
  6. Buy yourself a wife – Before you find yourself resenting your spouse because you are the breadwinner and expected to perform household duties, Torabi suggests you either change your expectations or hire a housekeeper.
  7. Break the glass ceiling (but carry a shield) – Don’t lose sight of your career. Accept the challenge presented by double standards, and learn to compartmentalize different facets of your life so you can be in the moment no matter your current role.
  8. Plan parenthood – Plan for the challenges child rearing presents and assign roles according to each partner’s skills and strengths.
  9. Grow a thicker skin – You will likely encounter someone who has a problem with your nontraditional role. Ignore them and focus on what works for your family – that’s the only thing that matters.
  10. Remember to breathe – Relax and do whatever you have to do to achieve happiness.

If you are a breadwinning female considering a prenuptial or postnuptial agreement, call our office today for a free consultation with an experienced San Diego divorce attorney: 858-345-1720.

 

Meet Your Dedicated San Diego Family Attorneys
Family Attorney John N. Griffith, CFLS
Family Attorney John N. Griffith, CFLS

Family Attorney, John N. Griffith, CFLS

John Griffith has practiced exclusively in the area of family law since 2009. John is a Certified Family Law Specialist certified as an expert in the area of family law by the California Board of Legal Specialization.

858-345-1720
john@gylfamilylaw.com

Family Attorney, Catie E. Young, ESQ.
Family Attorney, Catie E. Young, ESQ.

Family Attorney, Catie E. Young, ESQ.

San Diego family lawyer Catie Young has a wide range of litigation experience. She has worked in civil litigation. She has successfully represented clients in many areas of family law including child support, child custody, divorce and domestic violence. She has a unique approach to each child custody case, so clients of Griffith, Young & Lass tend to gravitate toward her in these cases.

858-345-1720
catie@gylfamilylaw.com

Family Attorney Amy J. Lass, Esq.
Family Attorney Amy J. Lass, Esq.

Family Attorney, Amy J. Lass, Esq.

Amy Lass was born in New York and raised in San Diego, California. Amy graduated from Cal Poly, San Luis Obispo in 2003 with a B.S. in Economics with a concentration in Enterprise Accounting and went on to earn her law degree from Thomas Jefferson School of Law and graduated cum laude in 2006. Amy takes a practical and cost considerate approach to the process while striving to balance the emotional needs and objectives of her clients.

858-345-1720
amy@gylfamilylaw.com

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