The holidays have come to an end and many are putting away their decorations, taking their lights down and putting their tree out by the trash cans. The new year has begun, and it is the time where most of us are all in on our resolutions. This is a time to make a change, to be a better you, or so they say.
Unfortunately for some who have been married whether a short or a long time, find themselves in a situation where being a better person means removing someone from their lives.
Let me tell you about a holiday that follows the first business Monday after New Years Day. It is “Divorce Monday” and this year it falls on January 6th. The reason for the timing of “National Divorce Day” is because many in a marriage that needs to be dissolved often wait to get through the craziness of the holidays.
The for now married couples likely agree to be cordial to one another for just a bit longer to keep the peace. They wait for relatives to go back home, for the children to be back in school and then they call their lawyers on what we like to call “D Day”.
I am returning to work today with a drive and determination to help my clients and the new clients I will gain under unfortunate, yet necessary circumstances. I receive more consultation calls on this day than other days and this year I would like to offer any help I can provide. I don’t care if you are a paying client or not, I love to guide anyone going through a divorce in the right direction.
Before I get into giving you my professional advice, I would like to offer you something you might need. I would like to tell you that I am proud of you for coming to this decision. I know you have given it a great amount of thought and this is not easy for you. My heart goes out to you and just know that you are making a positive step in the right direction.
Take a moment to take a deep breath and imagine all the progress you will see in a year. You will not be honoring Divorce Day next year because it will be in your past. Cheers to you and I applaud your courage to escape a toxic relationship. You had the courage to realize the growth you can make and will make as an individual.
I have been married for several years and am a parent myself, I understand the need you have to give your children the best world and to stand in front of anything that could harm them. From my experience in family law, I have come across countless parents with an incredible amount of guilt for the dissolution of their marriage. I like to say to them “Let’s celebrate the fact that you realize you can be a better parent by being an independent parent.”
Now here are some documents and pertinent information you will need to have ready before your consultation with me or any other attorney at our firm. As a partner of Griffith, Young, & Lass, I take pride in knowing that myself or anyone who works for us has the upmost knowledge to provide you with the best outcome. We are efficient over here and want you to dissolve your marriage with integrity and we hate to see a hit a on your bank account that is unnecessary.
- Income and Expense Declaration: this is a disclosure of the party’s income, expenses, and must include recent pay stubs.
- Your Questions for Your Divorce Lawyer: Any question is a good question. Be prepared to ask about issues regarding the cost, our accreditations, our communication style, our records, hourly rates and much more. We like to be upfront and realistic with our answers.
- Tax Returns: Bring your most recent tax return filed by you and your spouse. It would be greater help if you could bring a return from the year prior as well.
- Self-Employment Documents: If you or your spouse is self-employed, bring a current profit and loss statement as well as a balance sheet of any other relevant current documents.
- Facts Regarding Your Case: I would advise you bring a bullet-point list of facts about your family and children. This should include their birth dates and other important information.
- Information About the Other Party: This should include their place of employment, pay stubs, personality traits and any issues they may have that would be relevant to the case.
- Evidence: When divorce is on the table there are no rules and it can become hurtful. If there is any information or documents such as threatening text messages or emails, this will be relevant to the case.
Pause for a deep breath, take a sip of water, and congratulate yourself on getting this far. It is a new decade and I truly believe there are so many wonderful possibilities and chances for growth. I absolutely love helping my clients and being an attorney in a world where we often get a bad reputation.
I was at a holiday gathering recently and when I was asked the question, “what do you do for work?”, I replied saying I am a family law attorney. I received a judgmental look and not too long after, I overheard gossip regarding myself and my profession.
“What a miserable job,” a person who shall remain anonymous said.
Immediately I felt the urge to come in and defend myself, but I refrained. I know in my heart that I love to help people who are hurting. Divorce is hard and ultimately; I thrive in helping others pick up the pieces and move forward. I want to be a cheerleader in my client’s court, and I want them to know how strong and capable they are. I believe everyone deserves to be happy and sometimes divorce can ignite the step into a better life.
If you find yourself filing or seeking a consultation on “National Divorce Day”, I would love to chat with you. Give me a call or anyone at my office at (858) 371-5569 and I will see to it that you are taken care of.